Surprise!

Life is so full of surprises. Some are so good and fun, some so sad, and others leave you in a stupor. I hit this topic because I've had a few things rolling around in my mind and found that a lot of things take me by surprise. After reading my friends blogg, I was reminded of the day that Brent and I got engaged, and how much of a surprise that was... We had spoken of marriage and even looked at rings, but I had NO idea that he had gone and had the perfect one custom made. And I certainly didn't expect the proposal on the night that it happened! Good Surprise. I remember giving birth to Liza, we never knew if she was a boy or a girl, another tender and good surprise. Sometimes we get news that is surprising, and it leaves us with an edge of excitement that is mellowed only by a slight fear of the future. What will come of this new news. Like finding out what Medical School we got into, and placing in a residency. Having your bid accepted on your first home...good surprise! Finding out that your dearest friend, mother and grandmother to your 3 little ones has passed away..... bad surprise. Finding out that your Father in Law will remarry just months after her passing..... bad surprise. Getting news of the straying of a close family member.... bad surprise. A parent adamant about divorce....bad surprise. Which leads me to my stupor.... Realizing that some people in this world think that I blindly follow a religion that doesn't let me think for my self....stupor. Realizing that it really is all so true..... stupor. And the most recent... after placing a call to my mom tonight where I awkwardly got around to asking about my letter, she responded with, "yes, I read it." me "I wasn't sure since I didn't hear back" "I was going to write you an email, but I can just tell you that none of it surprised me. I fully expect you to feel that way and I accept that."........STUPOR. You may be wondering... how is that a surprise, to tell you the truth, I honestly didn't think that she knew me well enough to know how I felt. I have always felt like she doesn't know me. I am so glad that I wrote that letter, it was therapeutic, but also I am glad that it also helped me realize that we are not that far away from each other. I guess all those times that I talked to her and I thought she wasn't listening, maybe she was. It makes me think about how my kids will feel. This again leaves me in the stupor. Humm.